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NeverHow can my heart be filled with love for you,
Yet your heart is filled with love for another?
I watch her take the place I never filled,
The touch I never felt,
The whisper I never heard.
Why is it that in my eyes you are everything,
But in yours, I am nothing.
IdentityIt seems as if we continually have to make a change,
an eternal desire to find something for which we be exchanged.
Is perfection something to strive for?
Or will we always be left wanting more?
Perhaps it is flaws that give a sense of uniqueness.
But will we ever be content if flaws continued to be viewed as a weakness?
I refuse to be viewed as a project, with fixations needed.
A self alteration is something to never be conceded.
When I view myself, I will not experience a feeling of ambiguity,
Instead, I will experience a sense of pride with my identity.
UntoldAs said in Shakespeare's "Hamlet", one bares two faces:
The one that God gave you...
And the one that you show to the world.
Within each person is something hidden, locked away.
How do we enter this place so skillfully guarded?
Do we really know the ones we hold dear?
Or do we all have something left untold?
Euphoria of NightIt is night that is the match for time.
I watch as the hands spin as if dancing to the perfect song.
The greatest concerto of all is performed as the billions of fans gather around the brightest star.
The raven cloak wraps around me with a sense of secured freedom.
A soft, enchanting voice whispers in my ear and asks me to fly.
These wings will not exist as the enemy rises, but they will come again when the war of the sky is won.
ThornsI see you at first glace
Immediately captivated by your beauty
Your stem so strong and tall with pride
Your petals full of color and shape
I am a bud not yet blossomed
As I grow toward you
My stem embracing yours
I finally realize, you're covered in thorns
All That's LeftLet me hold you
Let comfort be what you feel
Let my lips kiss where your tears have fallen
Let a look into my eyes undo the wrong you've seen
Let the stillness of my breath replace the screams that have filled your ears
Let your mind be filled with thoughts of us instead of the memories that have haunted you
Let the walls around your heart collapse
Let my love be all that's left
A Cold HeartEach tear that falls reminds me of a time I thought you loved me.
One after another, they fall.
I attempt for these tears of sadness to mirror happiness for you,
That you found someone else. Someone better.
I cannot remember a life in which I did not love you.
I realize now that the silent gazes that I thought glowed with affection were one-sided.
My heart told me that our love is so deep no words need to be spoken, simply understood.
Now I know that if love should be matched to any word, simplicity would not be it.
My mouth could not speak words of love to you, for hearts other than ours could go cold,
Why would hearts be cold in order for mine to be warm?
Now I play the part.
False smiles will adorn my lips as I see you with her.
I must push the imaginations of me replacing her from my mind.
Words of encouragement will leave my tongue, although not my heart.
I want to hurt as if I have lost you...
But you were never mine to begin with.
The GrayI sit in the gray as you pull me each way.
It seems that your heart has a tendency to sway.
The black has become a familiar place.
The white, however, I can't seem to trace.
Of its existence, I am quite sure.
Perhaps it's mystery is apart of its lure.
I will not accept the darkness you cast.
I know this indecision cannot last.
Until you have your certainty I will count the days,
The days in which, I sit in the gray.
FantasyAs the tree branches sway to tap my window,
I close my eyes and fantasize they are your knuckles instead,
Gently knocking on the window to steal my attention,
To wisk me away and tell me you love me.
As I sit alone and face judgement of harsh eyes,
I imagine those eyes belonged to you,
Watching me affectionately,
Expressing a love too passionate for words.
As I walk through the crowded room and my hand is brushed by a stranger,
I dream it was no stranger at all,
That you would wrap your strong hands around mine gently,
Causing all worries to vanish, as I know I will be safe with you.
As I see her in your arms,
I pray someday you will be holding me instead,
That the world's constant spinning will slow,
That you will hold me forever and never let go.
If youIf you were the sun, I want to be your sky
If you were the moon, I want to be the stars
If you were a performer, I want to be your stage
If I was the moon, youd be the sun
If I was a leaf, you would be the gentle breeze that blows me away
If I was lost, would you look for me?
If love was the opening act, wed be the main event
If there was a painting, wed be the colors
If you loved me, my world would be all light.
Dying so YoungHer cold little fingers,
in between my hands,
Emerald green eyes,
never to see again,
Once was my love,
One I held so dear,
She was an angel,
but then was my fear,
Falling for ill,
in the still of the night,
Down on my knees,
crying from fright,
My poor little daughter,
Dying so young,
Now to close the casket,
forever from the sun.
Like Shattered GlassBroken bones like shattered glass
Crash down to the floor.
Her screams go unnoticed
Until she falls eerily silent.
"Shhh, it's only me."
Can anyone hear?
Does anyone know?
Arms pinned above her head,
She freezes in fear.
Please let it be quick this time.
Please let this end.
Close your eyes, child
And leave your body behind.
Tapped in these moments
I cannot forget.
I will always remember, and I cannot
Dark DaysMy days are grey
The sky is dark
I haven't got any luck, no
I try to find
a way to escape
But they don't let me walk, no
There's no obstacle
I can't beat
But I'm stuck in this chair
I see through the window
and I find out
People are running for their lives
I have no power, but
If you want war I'll give you war...
My days are dark
The sky is grey
I can find a solution
for my country
But I think I'll do it again
Confront Your StormsIf only you knew.
I've said those words infinite times,
Repetition streaming like raindrops,
Pounding, pounding, pounding
In a torrent.
The more I think them,
The greater the storm.
If only you knew.
Some days I step outside to a trickle,
Other days a surly drizzle
That merely inconveniences.
I duck my head,
Pop out my umbrella,
And continue on to class.
If only you knew.
Other days a flash flood of tears
And half-rational thoughts
Drown my feet in whirling combinations
And a thousand other emotions
Too complex to state by name.
Words turn to mud,
Mud to mires.
Then the only clear words within me are,
"If only you knew."
If only you knew.
Somewhere else on the planet you reside,
A massive urban landscape
Where you rarely step outside,
Or even hear the pitter-patter of rain
Tapping on your windows,
Asking to be let in.
You ignore the raindrops,
Don't want to know the weather.
But if only you knew.
Once I descended down from the storms I wreak
And knocked o
I hear it in the distance
Beautiful to my ears
Torture to my heart
Heightening my fears
For what lies ahead on this journey
I hear the bittersweet symphony
The soft notes painted in the back of my mind
Bleeding into the crevices of my thoughts
Fogging my vision of the future
Leaving my heart in distraught
Not yet knowing harmony
Just hearing the bittersweet symphony
Feeling the melody reach nearer
With each breath I take
The music creating lyrics on my tongue
Forming emotions I cannot shake
Insecurity, hope, jealousy, love?
Not wanting to be just a fantasy
Still I hear the bittersweet symphony
I turn to you for help
But you do not hear it
You're thousands of miles away
Oblivious to the bittersweet symphony that is haunting me..
Nothing's WrongAre you okay?
I walk away
Can't stand to look
At your face
Straight into your eyes
Without that feeling
That I despise
Are you okay?
Keep my head down,
Hand's in my pockets
I smile along
Except for me falling apart
That fear to leave my home
That fear to return
The fear of being followed
If you can't see it in me
Are you okay?
What does it look like?
To elude my true feeling
The blue under the red
But I say nothing
No one calls for help
Neither do I.
It's just one large social experiment.
I can't play the clown anymore
No longer can I smile
Are you okay?
It doesn't seem that way, are you sure?
You don't care anyway
You tried to take my life away
You pretend like it's fun and games
You made me fall right from the start
This is why I'm falling apart.
Hands in pockets
Given UpGiven Up
This paper has never been whiter.
This pencil has never been sharper.
This pen has never been so functional.
This garbage bin has never been emptier.
This garbage bin is as empty as my head.
But sure, I'll still try, right?
I've tried writing.
A thousand times I've tried!
And for what?
I'm done with the dissapointment,
My hopes, trashed.
My dreams, dead.
I give up.
I can't do this anymore,
Trying to write when I clearly can't.
I can't do this.
Simply YouA complexion unadorned with the demons of society.
Eyes with gentle waves that cleanse me of worry.
Lips as delicate as the petal of a rose.
A smile so bright the moon is full with envy.
Laughter that fills my ears with the most beautiful of melodies.
A soul of age, of wisdom, and of strength.
A heart that pounds with love for you.
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More